The big 3 by age 43 Leukemia, Congestive Heart Failure, Diabetes

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The big 3 by age 43 Leukemia, Congestive Heart Failure, Diabetes


Some of you reading this are probably wondering why I am sharing so many details of my life? Good question, I often ask myself the same. Is it because I want you to feel sorry for me? I THINK NOT! Or maybe I am living in fear? On the contrary, I have faced death so many times prior to my illnesses, I've literally lost count. Daily it seems like there is a loaded gun, a .357 magnum pointed at my head. Because by this time in my life, I have been diagnosed with diabetes, had a second heart attack (without knowing it), which did considerable damage to my heart, and what I hope is the final blow to my health, Leukemia.

While attending a funeral, my friend, Wesley Thomas, stated to me he heard about some of my challenges and suggested I share my story. The reason I share my testimonies with you are because I have been remarkably BLESSED. And I want you to grasp the Blessings in your life also,  through your own life's challenges!     You are not alone...

At the time I was diagnosed with leukemia I was very sick and immediately admitted into the hospital, complicated by my heart condition and diabetes. The doctor suggested that I get my living will done, which should have been done any way, and affairs together. I was truly devastated! I was not devastated because I was afraid to die, which was not the case. I was devastated because of the uncertainty not knowing whats going to happen to my wife and kids. You see, my mother passed away when I was age 15 and my father 4 yrs latter during my 1st year in college. I recalled how hard times were for my brother (my only sibling) and I. And the depression that followed was incapacitating.

I thought I was cursed because my parents were in and out of the hospital during my formative years and taken from me back to back. Even though my father saw me graduate, my mother was not there. Both parents never had the chance to meet my wife or their grand kids. My wonderful wife and kids never met my parents. I did not want my kids to go through the same turmoil that I did. I wanted to be there for their graduations. I want to be there when they get married and give my daughters away. I want to be there to see my grand kids. But suddenly it simply seem to me that was not going to be the case.

Definition

Chronic myelogenous leukemia is cancer that starts inside bone marrow, the soft tissue inside bones that helps form blood cells. The cancer grows from cells that produce white blood cells.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil;
For You are with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
Psalm 23:4 (New King James Version)

Life is Too Short!

Be Blessed

Monday, August 2, 2004

10:39:00 PM CDT
Feeling Happy
Hearing Old School Slow Jams R&B and a little Jazz

Too Blessed To Be Depressed

I remember whenever I asked Mr. Moore, a good friend of my Aunt Jeanette, how he was doing he would always responded by saying, "I am Too Blessed To Be Depressed".
A lot of us hate to get up on Monday mornings. We drag and drag. Some of us get depressed and go to work in a bad mood. Then, we wish our life away for TGIF and POOF we get our wish, the week-end rapidly approaches, passes by and then the whole vicious cycle starts over and over again. The next thing you know the babies have grown up,summer is over. Cherished friends and family passes away... and the next thing you know you're in your 30s, 40s, 60s, 70s years old(if your bless). Regrets start to hit you at different stages in your life.


The words of Mr. Moore were very profound, you see, when I came to get to know Mr. Moore, he had less than 6 months to live, he later passed away on his 70th birthday. I guess as he reflected on the memories of his life, he realized that every day that he spent on this earth was a blessing! Even the bad times and the Monday mornings. He cherished each and every single day. He cherished his daughter,the love of his friends and relatives, the memories of co-workers. As well as those whose paths that he came to cross on his lifes journey. He did not look at Monday morning as a curse, but a blessing to live for and to see.


I wonder how much happier life would be for us, if we too, looked forward to Monday mornings. We need to cherish every moment in life! Even the down side, we need to rejoice in all of the Monday mornings of life that God has brought us through .Think about how Sunday mornings lead into Monday mornings Monday mornings lead into the blessings of, Tue a.m,. Wed. am,Thur.am, Fri a.m. and Sat a.m.(Sabbath Morning) in which God rested because of all the days he made was Good, including Monday mornings.


We must remember when God Made all 7 days of the week, that each day is different and unique with moments of challenges & blessings, everything he made was Good. And it is Good to Be Alive!

Surely your goodness and unfailing love will pursue me
all the days of my life,
and I will live in the house of the Lord
forever. Psalm 23:6 (New Living Translation)

Shalom
Life is Too Short

Is This The Moment of My Death?

To read "Life Is Too Short" in chronological order, click here

Sunday, February 15, 2004 11:16:55 PM CST
Feeling Worried

Is This The Moment of My Death?

All fun aside, the situation I found myself in was extremely serious. I suddenly blurted out to Unneeda that I needed to goto the hospital immediately and begged Kendra(my daughter) for help as I stumbled down the stairs toward the living room, as if help was waiting for me there. For a moment I panicked. But I realized that panic was not going to do my pain stricken body or family any good. So I decided to lay down on the couch drenched in sweat and relax as Unneeda called the ambulance.
I suddenly found myself asking "Is this the Moment of My Death?" I thought about all of the wasted years not serving God, not answering to his multiple callings. The years of self indulgence, the wasted years of anger and feeling sorry for my self. The lack of relationship with those I love and those that love me. I thought of those who had passed on who I could had shared the good news of salvation with, but didn't. Oh the waste of time, the waste of opportunities, the petty life I had lived. I knew that I only deserved to go to hell.
A gentle Voice told me, I may dare speak to Him, but speak to Him now, for my time is very short. I prayed to God for sincere forgiveness. Forgiveness for not being faithful and for all my sins. I acknowledge to Him that I am in no way worthy of being brought into His Kingdom. But only by the Blood of His Son, Jesus Christ. Yet at this late hour I put everything into God's hands and waited upon Him, my fate. At that very moment, even though my body was wrenched with pain and my breath very faint, what was once my troubled soul, was replaced with a Blissful Unexplainable Peace!

Life Is Certainly, Too Short...
But it does not have to:

¹⁶ For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. John 3:16 (New King James Version)

Click Here To Learn The Truth About Death

Wednesday, March 17, 2004

7:53:38 PM CST
Feeling Happy

A Heart Attack Worth Having!

Sometimes bad things must happen in order for God to bless you with what things matters the most, family. Don't get me wrong, I don't go to bed every night praying to God to bless me with a Heart attack in the morning! What I mean is sometimes we pray for God's blessings and help, but we may not always realize or be prepared for how he would go about in answering our prayers.
Case in point, I have been praying for my kids salvation and well being all of their lives. And I have been blessed to realize the answer to that prayer long before the heart attack. One of the areas in which there was a tremendous void, was my relationship with my oldest then, 20yr old daughter Brishette. I did not want to leave this planet with her just being a mere acquaintance to her younger brother, sister & myself. And I have prayed for years that the Lord would somehow intervene and change the situation. And after hearing her voice on the phone while in the hospital and since my release, her sister Kendra is going to fly to LA and spend sometime with her oldest sister at her college & we all are growing closer together! God is truly remarkable! He in his mysterious ways, has defiantly made this "A Heart Attack Worth Having" Becaues "Life Is To Short
Meet my Daughter Brishette! Click here

A Young Man Shot 4 times in the back of the head

8/2/09
Sunday evening
Mood: Reflecting

The senseless murder of Aaron Powell

I have been to several funerals during the last 12 months and in my lifetime. And I attended yet another one yesterday. The lost of a love one or friend is particularly sad. I should know since I lost both my parents by the time I was nineteen years of age, while going to college. But the one I went to yesterday bothered me quite a bit. It was the funeral of my 2nd cousin, age 35, who was cowardly shot in the back of the head. Shot 4 times without mercy, as he leaned over in his parked car to change a CD, while hanging out with so called friends. This happen at approximately 3:30 a.m. in the morning. And oh, by the way, no one seen anything. No one has come forward. Aaron was not just another statistic, he was a human being whom I seen grow up from a toddler. He was someone's son, someone's brother, someone's uncle & someone's father. The tragedy is that his 4 innocent children will now grow up without their Daddy.

And to be murdered at age 35yrs old is not particularly the life span of the average American. The previous funerals I've attended were folks, whom I also feel that their lives were cut short in this sin filled world, but they were in their 70's through age 89. These individuals had the opportunity to see their kids come into adulthood and be part of their grandchildren lives, in which I consider to be an exceptional blessing. These individuals were not murdered by someone who they considered to be a friend but died by natural causes.

From generation to generation we have seen too many pointless killings & violence in the urban core of our cities. Last night I learned that my 17yr old nephew was severely beaten up and his automobile stolen from him, while visiting his girlfriend on Friday night. In approximately the same general area in which my cousin was brutally murdered. As I watched the news last night, at least 2 more senseless murders had occurred in the same area yet another shooting and a fatal stabbing. In the same urban area as the previous mentioned atrocities. These self afflicted crimes against humanity just goes on and on and on.

As the preacher said at Aaron's funeral yesterday, there is truly a "curse" I call it a "sin curse" on our communities not only in Kansas City, but this plagues us across America. Our communities will continue to be cursed until we get tired of it and do something about it. Generations of young people are being wiped out before our very eyes by the spread of HIV/AIDS, violence and incarcerations. It is time, past time, that we get past our petty scaubles in the churches and the doctrinal idiocentricities that divide us. We must meet the youth's needs where they are. We need to be there for them, talk to them, spend time with them. Communicate with them even if they don't want to hear it, but they hear you. The urban youth needs positive roll models besides ballers, rappers and actors. "We all have gifts that God has given each of us individually, USE THEM! And let us not be luke warm" as Darla Roundtree so beautifully stated at her very inspirational but timely concert last night. We must keep it real for the youth because believe it or not, they can spot a fake in a New York second. As Hilary Clinton coined the phrase a few years ago "it takes a village" to raise our children, we must become that village. And most important, let us teach our kids how to love themselves, self love. Because Jesus love them more and paid the ultimate price to prove it. Because "Life Is Too Short"

Point your kids in the right direction—
when they're old they won't be lost. Proverbs 22:6 (The Message)


GOD Bless You.
Learn The Truth About Death! click here

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